Poem of a flesheating anxiety

 

I have such an extreme fear of saying no. And speak up when something is bothering me. I’ve never had a problem discussing political issues, and protesting against the majority when there is something I believe in, but when the time comes to simply speak my mind about either my feelings or my thoughts about certain emotional issues I simply shut down.

I bury my feelings deep down, and let them dwell as cancer in the back of my mind. Feelings of being eaten away by my own anxiety sometimes become so overwhelming I don’t know what to do. Thoughts like “Did I say something wrong?” “Am I the scratch inside of their mouth they can’t seem to stop licking, and that never ever goes away?”

 

Words

Short

Un-Rhythmical

Unethical

Worthless

Piece

Of

“Art”

Ugly

On the

Paper

Beautiful

In

Mind

Dear Oklahoma

I usually do not quote the bible. However, sometimes what you really want to say has been said before. There have always been times where man feels powerless and small, and at those times we need to linger on to everything we know to be true. There will be better times, and your wounds will eventually heal. I am sending all my love to you, Dear Oklahoma.

Norway Sucks?

To just lay out my story: I currently work at a mall in my local community. This very morning I was standing close to the exit wrapping up some sort of new product. That’s when I got the pleasure of seeing young Norwegians at their best. Three kids were walk past me screaming out “Norway sucks, Norway sucks, Norway sucks”!

My jaw dropped to the floor, or it sure as hell felt like it. What is wrong with these kids? What is wrong with the Norwegian people in general? We are one of the wealthiest countries in the world, we got (almost) free healthcare, and everyone are able to get up to a 20 year free education. I’m talking serious phd. University education, for free!

And still, for some reason the Norwegian people just won’t seem to stop their whining. I’m not saying things could not get better, because there is always room for improvement. It just takes the best of me, seeing how horribly unsatisfied our people are. It just frustrates me to the melting point to see people complain about things so many people would die just to have a bit of. The western civilization is so lucky and we completely forget that there are others out there.

If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness. It will change your life mightily. -Gerald Good

“All it comes d…

“All it comes down to is this: I feel like shit but look great.”

For a long time American Psycho was my favorite film. It had and still has it all. However it was first when I read the book that I got the film. You can really not comprehend all of its satire elements without first reading the book. Therefore I recommend everyone that has not read it, to do so. It is really a splendid book about today’s society. And off course it struggles with my favorite topic of discussion, greed.

NB! Some humor is needed to get maximum pleasure from the book.   

A psychotic

Imagine yourself going for a walk. In your pocket lays four fifty dollar bills. Your heading for the mall, exited for what you are going to buy. Then you walk pass a homeless man. His cup filled with nothing but lousy change. He looks up at you, smiling. He is not begging for your money, he is simply smiling. What do you do? Do you smile? Do you sit down with him right there on the sidewalk and chat a little? Or do you smile, sit down, and give him one of your fifty dollar bills? In all probability you walk right pass him. And keep your course steady until you get to the wall.

Now imagine yourself standing at work or at school. Right next to you stands four girls teasing or bullying another girl. You stare at the girl’s eyes; you can see she is scared, at the brink of tears. You have seen here before, walking down the hall doing so with a bit of a limp. What do you do? Do you walk right in to the bullying asking them to stop? Or do you simply turn away?

This two things are pretty much everyday things. If you add some more horrific stuff like war, surveillance, human trafficking, drugs, rape, murder, prostitution, child pornography, terror, starvation, poverty and of course children dying from thirst. Well then you really got something. Where am I going with all of this?

Well William S. Burroughs once said  “A psychotic is a guy who’s just found out what’s going on”.  I somehow believe he was god damn right.

The true genius…

The true genius shudders at incompleteness – and usually prefers silence to saying something which is not everything it should be.

A beautiful quote by the magnificent Edgar Allan Poe.

What defines beauty?

We can complain about today’s ideal body. We can yell at the skinny girls. And tell them that their body looks unhealthy. This off course would be unfair to all of the girls that are skinny simply because they are born that way. We could also tell all the fat girls that they are unhealthy and that they need to drop some serious weight to go forward as a good example. This off course would be wrong, because they might be just as healthy as any other person you seen on the street. We could also tell the muscular girls that they look like men, and that women are not supposed to look that way. This would be wrong simply because they might define beauty and a different way than you do.

So what is beauty? What defines beauty? Wikipedia told me this: Beauty is a characteristic of a person, animal, place, object, or idea that provides a perceptual experience of pleasure or satisfaction. Beauty is studied as part of aesthetics, sociology, social psychology, and culture. An “ideal beauty” is an entity which is admired, or possesses features widely attributed to beauty in a particular culture, for perfection.

When we read this we can understand that there is no real definition of the word beauty. Because what gives people satisfaction is so individual there is no real answer to any of it. It seems that the saying that goes like this “Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder” really makes a lot of sense. So the next time we see someone we believe to be ugly, we should remind our self that there is no true definition of beauty, therefor there can’t be no true definition of ugly.

With this knowledge you could also slowly but surely cure your own bad self-esteem (that is if you have such a thing). You could set your own look to be your very own definition of beauty and in that way see yourself as beautiful. Or simply tell yourself that it does not matter if you don’t look like the unreal looking people in the magazines, because beauty cannot be defined, and somewhere out there will be someone that believe you are the definition of beauty.

uty

Money for a dead son

The 22 of July. A date every Norwegian person will associate with death and tragedy. With 77 people murdered in the matter of hours Anders Behring Breivik made himself the most infamous man alive in Norway today. Our country was in a state of shock. People cried on national television, and our prime minister promised that with love and hugs we could cope with our losses.

Never the less, some people cannot repair pain with love. Some people turn their heads towards the gold, the money, the disgusting paper that separates the successful from the unsuccessful. The father of one of the many children that were murdered on Utøya the 22 of July, is now (read this) suing the government because he felt like the 50.000 American dollars he already got was not enough. The 50.000 were meant to be compensation for the loss of his child. It may be that I am cold, and distant. I do not know anyone that died that day. What I do know is that if I lost one of my loved ones no price would be able to make up for their death. How can a father set a price on his own child, how can he ask the government for money they do not owe him. Does he somehow believe that with a fat bank account he will not mourn the loss of his son?

There is no time where people will not feel the urge for more. Greed has been here as long as the humankind has. Greed penetrate our lives, piercing our hearts like darts trough a balloon. We should all feel ashamed, and those of you that is able to understand this fathers need for more money should be even more ashamed. It is time that mankind understands that money can never buy or compensate for a person we love, or for that matter anything else. The only thing money can compensate for is money itself.

A fake generation

As I was taking a ride in my fathers car early this morning I heard something rather interesting on the radio. A eye doctor could report about a new trend in lenses. Fellow youtubes how probably picked it up already, but for those of you how do not know of this new dolleyed trend it is girls using big black contact lenses to look like well, DOLLS. And where does that leave us? What does that make us? FAKE.

We smile to the camera, and cry in the mirror.

We bleach our hair, skip our lunch, pull out our teeth, put in new teeth. We put lenses on our eyes, and harm them at the same time. We starve. We stop paying taxes to start buying shoes. We get fake tans, fake hair, fake nails, fake eyelashes. We transform ourselves into something unreal, to feel, WTF good?

Pretty?

We shall require a substantially new manner of thinking if mankind is to survive

Working class hero

Everyone walks around believing that the honest and hard working people of the working class is there to serve them. Not to provide them with the things they need, to serve them. “Hallo Sir, I am your slave for today”.

What makes you believe you are worth more then me? Is it your fat wallet? Is it your shiny hair, and long lashes? Is it the car you drive? Do you mock me when you see me taking the bus? Do you believe that just because I smoke cigarettes and drink cheep beer, that I am some kind of a lowlife? Are you better than me with your fashion magazines and Voss water? Do you make fun of my points of view when I am not around?

You might believe I am just a poor punk, but believe me, I am not. I am just tierd of people believing that poor people live poor lifes. I am tierd of people believing that money is the aweswer to every question.

Soo long